Tips for Fostercare and Caring for the Traumatized Child
By Dr. Cheryl Andaya
Tips from Other Foster Parents
Are you a resource caregiver/fosterparent? Wonder why your foster children are aggressive, wet themselves, are oppositiona, and have difficulty adjusting? Want to know what you can do?
Dr. Andaya was asked to do a presentation on the psychological perspective of parenting a child who has had suffered from child maltreatment. Having worked in the area of child maltreatment for nearly 2 decades, she shares about her clinical experiences and provides insight into the behaviors and challenges resource caregivers often face in caring for these resilient children.
The resource caregivers in the audience also asked questions and shared their experiences with parenting children who come from hard places.
As I was preparing for the presentation, I went on a couple FaceBook groups and someone asked what advice would fosterparents give about fostering. Here is what they said…
Quotes were taken with permission from the individual who posted the comment.
´“Pay attention to the signs that you need to take a break. Or you and partner need to recharge. Otherwise there will be a grey cloud over your house.”
´“…never ever say anything negative about bio parents.”
´“…treat your foster kids the same as you do your bio.” It will prevent the message of “I value you less.”
´“Lower your expectations for what you think support/acceptance will be like from family and friends.”
´“Do not take words personally!!”
´“You’re going to be shocked by the abuse that your kids have been through”
´“Don’t think just because the child is a teenager that you can expect them to act older.”
´“always speak with an even tone even when you’re angry”
´“use respite when needed”
****I will be adding to this list and include other excerpts from my presentation. I’m also hoping to post the recorded video of the presentation. To be alerted when the post is up, subscribe and comment. Thanks for reading. Aloha!
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I’m a mother and a Clinical Psychologist who works with children and their families as well as individuals reaching for their goals. Born and raised in Hawaii, I embrace diversity and help individuals find their strengths.